A parody of 'Charlie on the MTA.' It's about spoiled, narcissistic jerks everywhere.
Lyrics
Charlie May Never Return
A Parody of “Charlie on the MTA”
New lyrics by Steve Bryant
Let me tell you the story of a man named Charlie,
He got millions for his pay.
He threw it away, claiming he was special.
Because of his DNA.
He may never return, no he may never return.
All his rants as clear as mud.
Doesn’t know how much it will finally cost him,
His Adonis DNA and Tiger Blood.
Charlie looks like Skeletor from all his binges.
Still he does just as he pleases.
He’s has every drug in known to man in his system.
And lots of new social diseases.
For every show he was paid 2 million.
Now he’s on the net for free.
Bacteria is doing the backstroke in his bloodstream.
And it burns when he has to pee.
Now Webster’s’ Dictionary has a great big problem.
All the scholars’ heads are spinning.
They have to make sure that narly is in all new printings
With a new definition for winning.
Now if you’re not careful, you could be like Charlie,
And live with the disgrace.
And die from STD’s, booze and lots of cocaine.
With a big smile on your face.
(Last)
He may never return, he may never return.
His cast and crew are out of work.
But he’ll live forever in the effing reruns.
And die a narcissistic, drunken jerk.